fear of the Lord – Page 3 – The Bless Your Heart Blog

Birthday Bonanza 2015 – Part 2

In case you ddin’t see that late post yesterday, here’s the link to Part 1 of the Birthday Bonanza post.

We made sure and had an actual birthday party during the birthday weekend…

We found the majority of the fabric for $1/yard and scooped it up immediately! We just made some simple bunting and table runners and Wrexy sewed the backdrop. God bless him…

Grandma LOVES her family and LOVES pictures, so I made bingo cards with family faces and we played that during her party.

That project, honestly, was one of the more time consuming. Each card had to be different and random…glad that one’s over. 🙂

I covered some tin cans with cute paper and scrap fabric, attached a few horses and filled them with flowers for centerpieces…

Wrex made a barnwood plaque and we shaped an M out of a rope (for Maxine) and hung it on the backdrop…this was probably my favorite part of the whole thing.

Seeing it all for the first time... — Seeing it all for the first time…

My fabulous friend Stephanie (who also made Wryder’s tractor cake) made me some flower cupcakes and they turned out sooooooooo cute!

Since we couldn’t fit 80 candles on a cupcake (or even a larger cake) we made a cake plate full of candles for her to blow out. Apparently, the fire/smoke detector is INCREDIBLY sensitive at this place and before we even had them lit, the fire alarm went off! THAT was something we’d never forget! Thankfully they got it shut off, the building was still standing and she got them blown out in 3 tries!

It does look like quite the blaze... — It does look like quite the blaze…

We ate and drank and played games and then watched the video I talked about yesterday. I didn’t intend to make everyone cry but there were a few wet faces in the crowd…it’s been a life well-lived for sure…

The other thing Grandma really wanted to do was to have a talent show. She thinks she has one of the grandest, most impressive families on the planet and she wanted to see us do our thang!

There was ribbon dancing…

Vocal performances…

Skits…

Bedtime stories…

and a lot of smiles and laughter!

We played a little more pitch and then went to bed far too late, yet again. 🙂

We worshiped together on Sunday morning and Clint shared a message with us about family…a good word! We took communion together and remembered what the Lord has done for us….oh. so. much…

We ate one last meal together, packed up, cleaned up and went our separate ways… We sent the troops off with some trail mix and a hand stamped keychain.

I found all of these vintage boots and guns on Etsy…

and then we bought some metal blanks and memorialized them. I LOVED how these turned out!

Our prayer has been for Granny to feel so loved…to honor her…for her ideas and imaginations about her birthday weekend to be met or exceeded…and for this to be a catalyst for future and more frequent get togethers.

We pray we have countless more years together with our sweet Granny but none of us are guaranteed our next breath. We get ONE family; one crazy, imperfect family that most likely loves the stuffing out of us. Carve some time out of your schedule for them. We all make time for what’s important to us – it can’t be disproved – what does your schedule say is important to you?

All-in-all, it was a magnificent weekend! We had so much fun with the family and we had so much fun working together. There is no one I’d rather do all these crazy projects with than this handsome man of mine… There’s been lots of talk of doing this whole reunion thing again and these Phipps are on board! 🙂

Grandma, we love you. This was just one tiny little way we could bless you back for all of the countless ways you’ve poured out your love for us. Happiest of birthdays, sweet lady!

Oh! And one other memorable moment from the weekend (besides the fire alarm scaring the heck out of everyone in a 100 yard radius?!)…Sawyer lost her first tooth! She was so excited and the tooth fairy found her even though she wasn’t in her normal bed!

Pardon her poor eyes – it was early! There’s one more that is just hanging on by a thread! I better get to the ATM….

Birthday Bonanza 2015 – Part 1

So, I’ve had just a few things on my plate here lately, the biggest of which (so far) culminated this weekend in Kansas. Wrex’s Grandma Rusk turned 80 years old on Sunday and her only request was to have all of her family in one place…to spend time with them and make new memories and to share with them her love for the Lord and her desire for them to know and love Him, too. Why in the world would ya not show up for that?!

Granny is a ranchy thing, but you’d never know it just by looking at her. She’s always put together – never a hair out of place – yet tough as boot leather. I went with a vintage cowgirl/shabby chic theme for her invitations and party decor. Maybe I say this every time, but HONESTLY, this was my favorite party that I have thrown. It’s probably because the woman for whom I threw it is just out of this world lovely… I can’t say enough good things about her here, so you’ll just have to watch the video I made regarding her life. It sums it up to the best of my abilities. (It’s not perfect but after 36 attempts – not even kidding – to read it without crying, that was the best I could do).

I found the kids some little plastic spurs from Party City that they wore the first night. They. were. ADORABLE! Wryder had already lost his rowel at this point but still cute!

Leading up to the event, our family committed to covering it and everyone invited (Grandma, her 5 kids and spouses, grandkids and great-grandkids) in prayer. It’s hard to get 30+ people in one place at one time and we know that satan hates family and does everything in his power to attempt to divide them and we refused to let him.

That alone was such a rewarding time for our little family…something we plan to continue.

Grandma was so excited the day of the event, she woke up at 5:30am, got around and left even sooner than she needed to – she just couldn’t contain herself!

We gave her the grand tour, as we had all kinds of little surprises planned for her.

The only thing missing was the guest book because a certain 2 year old decided to sign the cover himself. *ahem* Thank goodness Granny thought that made it even cuter…

We bought a bundle of cheap cedar shingles and I painted them all to use as signage as the weekend. We had each person’s name on their respective doors and used them for directions and welcomes, etc.

We wanted to make the birthday girl’s room a little extra special so we had a few little things up our sleeve to do so.

When we sent out the invitations, we also included cards for each family member to fill out regarding their favorite thing about and favorite memory with Granny and asked them to send them back with their RSVP cards. We collected all of those and then tied them to the ends of balloons so when she walked in, she had a room full of love waiting to greet her!

Checking out her room.... — Checking out her room….

In everyone’s room, we left them a little goodie bag with fresh fruit, water, an itinerary of weekend events, the jelly belly bean-boozled game for late night fun and a name collage of our entire family. The family hadn’t been all together in a quite some time and we just wanted to make everyone feel as welcome as possible – we were so excited to be together again!

Friday night, Grandma wanted to have a pitch tourney and we couldn’t say no to that! This is quite the competitive group and there was quite a bit of whooping and hollering! 🙂

We had the idea to make Grandma the star of the show for this event and we made her the queen of the cards. I printed some pictures of her and photoshopped some crowns on her head and then mounted them on foam board. We loved the way they turned out!

Isn't she a beauty?! — Isn’t she a beauty?!

The queen in the flesh... — The queen in the flesh…

Some serious card playing - see the shuffler?! — Some serious card playing – see the shuffler?!

Wrex’s sister gathered prizes for the top two highest scores, one of which was Wrexy – no surprise there – and we used some old acrylic plates we had from a display case that we took apart and made plaques to go with them…

The losers got a little something, too. When we hosted pitch parties in Denver, we always tried to make the loser trophy completely ridiculous. I was at the dollar store before our trip and set out to find the most ridiculous looking thing I could find and I happened upon a glittery pirate owl. What the heck?! So I consulted the bestie on what to call the trophy and she came up with “Aye didn’t play my carrrrrds right!” Yes, she’s a genius.

Ashley took home one and Waco the other…he with a little less excitement than she. 😉

Saturday morning, we took professional family photos and then we all gathered to sit at the feet of 80 years of love and wisdom. Grandma shared her heart and her deep and abiding love with us and we got to tell stories and laugh and cry and reflect upon 80 incredible years… It was a really, really good time.

We had some lunch and then we reconvened for a little Minute to Win It showdown. This was so much more fun than I even hoped it would be!

M&M Elevator - good watchin'! — M&M Elevator – good watchin’!

Seriously, that was SO much fun! The Phipps’ are hosting a Minute to Win It night SOON – get ready!

That afternoon, we had an official birthday party for the birthday girl…but I’ll save those for tomorrow… You’re not gonna wanna miss it – trust me!

Imperfection Does Not Equal Failure

Last week, Wrex and I attended the funeral of the patriarch of his former employer. Gene Ritchey died at the ripe old age of 86. He was, truly, one of the kindest most innovative men the world has ever known.

Gene is credited with creating the first ear tag for cattle that allowed producers to individually identify livestock. To date, his is the only ear tag on the market that won’t fade! Wrex and I got to travel for the company the year after Sawyer was born promoting the tags across the US and it as one of my favorite years ever. It’s an incredible product and easy to back. 🙂

Gene was always thinking, always creating, always trying to make things better. He was at the shop every single day, working on templates and presses and machines; he was their very own one-man research and development department. At nights, after the staff had gone home, the phone would ring to his living room so he could assist customers across the globe so they didn’t have to talk to a machine.

We lived on the same property as he did and it wasn’t the easiest place to find. There were several occasions where the pizza delivery man went to his house by mistake and it was a rare occasion when they pizza guy showed up at our place and the bill wasn’t paid. That stinker!

He made Wrex and I’s wedding bands…turned them and engraved them all himself. Wrex’s got lost in the Poudre River and mine got lost in the last move. I’d give anything to have those back…

He always had a sweet smile and kind word for us and loved to dote on Sawyer.

She was just a tiny thing at the time and he’d hold and rock and coo with her to beat the band. He made an incredible pancake with a homemade caramel syrup that was to die for and he was never lacking in interesting conversation or corny jokes. 🙂 He loved to watch the History Channel and the Discovery Channel and he and Wrex could talk that stuff for hours.

Gene held hundreds (if not thousands) of patents for things he’d created and invented and bettered over the years. He was always, always trying something new. Two of my favorite inventions were the energy drink he made for himself out of instant coffee and orange juice concentrate (and who knows what else!) and the contraption he made that allowed him fewer walks to the restroom which included a tube and a ziploc bag…I’ll let you use your imagination on that one! HA!

Gene loved the Lord and he loved his family and we had the privilege of being treated like one of them.

His funeral was an honor to his life and the legacy he has left behind. There were so many poignant things that were said regarding him, but one of the things that struck me the hardest last week was the subject of failure. It’s something I’ve heard time and time again – never be afraid to fail – but it’s never resonated with me like it did at his service.

Just like any inventor, Gene had some huge successes, but he also had his fair share of failures; ideas that never panned out, prototypes that never worked, products that didn’t sell…but never once do I think of those things when I think of him.

Doesn’t the same go for us? Just because we stick our neck out and try something new and aren’t wildly successful at it doesn’t make us a failure. If our speech wasn’t perfectly polished or we didn’t sell as many crafts as our neighbor or our friend had more likes on Facebook or the car we bought blew up in our face or our scale still had too many numbers after weeks of dieting or the gourmet dinner tasted like cat food or {insert a glaring failure here} doesn’t mean that we are a loser or destined for the bottom rung of the corporate ladder or unworthy of love…it just means that the thing you did wasn’t perfect. And who can claim to be perfect, anyways?

I think the black-and-white brain I have always has the tendency to separate things into two categories and only two categories. Black or white. Right or wrong. True or false. Success of failure. For some things, that theory holds true…but for others? Not so much.

I’ll be honest, I like to do things with excellence. If I’m going to spend my time and resources doing something, I want to go all out and do it to the best of my ability. Perfection would be my preference…

Just because I fail (read – wasn’t perfect at) one thing doesn’t mean that it wasn’t successful in some form. And even if it really was an all out failure, it doesn’t mean I’m any less of a person or any less worthy of love or friendship or any less loved by the Father or have any smaller chance of success in the future… Sometimes it really is those stumbling blocks that propel us forward anyway.

I’m guessing some of you reading this are like, “uh….duh…” but it really, really hit me hard last week. I’ve been holding back on sooooooooo many things out of the fear of failure or the fear of imperfection.

But it got me thinking…what IS the worst that could happen??

I remember the day I started this blog. I knew I was supposed to…the Lord had provided everything I needed…I had my content… I wrote my first post really fast, slammed the computer shut and didn’t open it for HOURS. WHO CARES if I only have 12 readers (including my parents and my husband)? It was an act of obedience and I enjoy it and it’s a written legacy for my kids to have one day. That? Is success in my book.

So, if you’re reading this and a light bulb went off in your head, I encourage you to be fearless! Imperfection does not equal failure. Start that project, write that book, make that recipe, design that product, cut that hair, sew that fabric, toil that ground, let your imagination run wild! Above all else, if the Lord has instructed you do something…by golly, do it. Do it. Get out there and do it!

The Sunday before his funeral, momma-Jeanie posted this blog and I left that tab open on my computer for days…days! Then, the message at the funeral. I love how the Lord confirms Himself in multiple ways so that we really get it…

So don’t give up your day dream, as they say, even if it’s looking dead. Every possible chance for it to live again is in the shriveled, dried up grain of a plan, a hope, a heart’s wish. You never know who might come along and give you another chance, or even more. The life is in the seed. *poof!

Let’s be fearless and fruitful together! Here’s to living a life unafraid of failure; a life that isn’t measured by perfection…

Thank you, Grandpa Gene, for inspiring us even in your death…you will be missed.

Five in a Flash

Sweet Sawyer…

We call you that all the time and that little name was dubbed you before you were even born. “Sweet Sawyer” was plastered all over your baby shower along with lots of real sweets, to boot. 🙂 It was if we already knew… May I just say you have fully lived up to and embraced that name.

There is so much I could write about you on your birthday… I love your beautiful face and your keen eye for fashion… I love how girly you are and how you love to create outfits and change clothes, shoes and hair accessories 14 times a day… I love how you love being outside and coming in filthy after a hard day of building and digging and wrangling goats… I love how you plan parties and feasts and parades… I love how much you love people, even those that have done nothing to deserve the unconditional love you so freely share…

I have so many favorites about you but my favorite thing about you is your heart…

You have a heart for your siblings. The Lord chose you to be the first born; the big sister of the Phipps family. Daddy and I know it’s a hard job sometimes (we were firstborns, too!) but you do it oh-so well. The way you care for and protect and mother (and attempt to discipline) Wryder and Sayble is so sweet. They adore you and we couldn’t ask for a better role model and example for them to look up to.

You have a heart for obedience. Ever since you were just a tiny thing, daddy and I would set one rule and we never had to worry about you even testing that boundary. You spoiled us, kiddo. And tricked us into believing all children were that way. Not so. *ahem* You choose obedience daily and are quick to ask the Lord and us for forgiveness when you feel as if you’ve fallen short.

You have the heart of servant. This is one of my favorite things about you because it’s somewhat of a lost trait in today’s society. You are the first one to rush over and pick something up if it gets dropped or the first to rush in with a towel to clean up a spill (and we have a few of those around here). You never tire of helping with chores or cleaning your room or helping mom plan a party.

Monday night, we came home WAY past bedtime and Sayble was tired and hungry and my foot was killing me and you guys needed a snack and dad needed to run to the barn to put the cat away so you enthusiastically jumped right in and got fruit, cheese and milk for you and Bubba. That blessed me so much and you do that kind of stuff every. day.

You have the heart of a worshiper. The Lord showed me that before you were even a year old and boy is it true. There are no better days than when we just spend some time worshiping through song together. I love when you want to sing when I do your hair or when we all (attempt) to play instruments or when I hear you singing in the spirit in your room or in the car. It’s a joyful noise to His ears, no doubt.

You have a heart of generosity. You so freely share your things. I can’t count how many times you find out someone is coming over or it’s someone’s birthday and you rush up stairs and rifle through your trinket drawers and come down with something wrapped up to give them. You shower me with flowers (and a few weeds) and little notes and pictures all the time. I wouldn’t trade those for the world, you know…

And, fellow readers? If Sawyer ever bestows upon you a half-used chapstick or a too small bracelet or a chicken feather or a few coins…receive them and receive them with gusto! These are some of her most treasured possessions and she’s chosen to share them with YOU.

You have a heart that seeks Jesus. Daddy and I have been amazed at the spiritual maturity you possess for being so young. (We might be a wee bit jealous, too). You are constantly asking questions about how to hear from the Lord and how NOT to hear from satan and how to tell the difference. You are quick to share the gospel even when you get rejected. You love to “read” your Bible and you love our family devotion and prayer time. The zeal in which you seek Him is inspiring.

I think that’s what it boils down to, sweet Sawyer…you inspire me. You make me want to be a better mom and sister and friend……..you make me want to be more like you.

I would be remiss if I didn’t say that these five years have gone fast. Too fast. In a flash you’re five and my heart is bursting with pride regarding you. I’m so excited about these new stages and adventures we’re encountering…but I can’t help but think of all the ways I’ve failed you as a momma. I’m so far from perfect it’s revolting….but I sure do love you.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…if I knew every kid we’d have would be just like you, I’d have 10 more in a heartbeat. Sure would. Until then, I’ll continue to bless you and bless the day you were born!

I bless you with a continued life of obedience. It will serve you well in all walks of life but I pray that that obedience is always born out of a love for the Lord, not because of a set of rules. I pray that because you love Him you so much, your heart can’t bear to bend any other way than towards righteousness.

I bless you with Godly friends and relationships. You are so kind and so giving and so merciful and so forgiving and so loving and I pray all of that is given right back to you ten-fold. I pray that as you get older that the Lord would deliver you a good friend to walk this life with who will be just as invested in the relationship as you are.

I bless you with lots of opportunities to hear from the Lord. I pray that He would continually be in your ear and in your heart and that you would be attuned to listen and obey.

I bless you with a family who models what it means to love the Lord. We fall short so often, sweet girl, but you inspire us to constantly strive to do better and strengthen our relationships with Him as well.

I bless you with the calling of the Lord on your life…that you would hear it and know it from an early age and that you would stop at nothing to a live a life that is pleasing to him.

Sweet Sawyer, you are so special to us…irreplaceable….one of the biggest blessings we’ve ever been given. It’s an honor and a privilege to be your momma. Happy birthday, beautiful! Let’s party!

Thankful to Tears

Today is one of those days. My heart is so full and so empty, all at the same time. We’ve had two of the best days of the summer thanks to some beautiful friends who came to spend a few days with us. They left today and we’re all feeling so full of heart, yet so emotionally raw.

Sawyer broke down at the lunch table a bit ago crying because she missed them already. Through her tears, she said, “I just love them so much.” Well said, sugar. Well said.

The Lord has been so gracious to my family and has blessed us with some pretty fantastic people that we get to do this life with…

Our neighbors are special people. If I have to live in the-middle-of-nowhere Colorado, I am certainly glad they are here with me.

There’s not much that can warm my heart more than when someone dotes on or shows kindness to or gives gifts to my kids. When someone goes out of their way to compliment them or include them or speak life to them or protect them just as they would their own, that’s a special thing…and Gillian does just that.

This woman has shown me what it’s like to love other people’s kids.

Sawyer with Gillian (and friends) on her wedding day

I’ll easily admit, I haven’t been the greatest at that. Sometimes, other people’s kids are a bit hard to love, ya know what I mean? You know you do…. I’m getting better, because of people like her.

Any and every time I’ve needed her to watch the kids (or when they’ve just flat begged to go over) she has never made me feel like a burden, has always begged for them to come right back and always has fun things for them to do while they are there. She’s always got her eye on them and sends me pictures of their day. She hugs them and loves on them just as she does her own son. She is a safe (and fun) place for them and that alone is priceless to me.

She is beautiful – seriously beautiful – and kind and gracious and encouraging. I could talk to her for hours even though we usually only get minutes! She is one of our biggest treasures and one of my favorite friends.

Gillian, we are so thankful for you. Thank you for teaching my through your example how to love other people’s kids and to love them well….

This lady…

What in the world would I do without this lady?

She is a well of wisdom; deep abiding waters drenched in love with a knack for spilling it out at just the right time in just the right way. ***My phone dinged minutes ago with her checking in, asking me to be kind with myself.

She’s a momma to me. She’s stood beside me as I birthed all three of my babies and got to bless them in Jesus name as I recovered. She has listened to my scared and aching heart more times than I care to count. She has stood in the familial gap when there’s been no one on my side to stand with me. She is sensitive to the Holy Spirit and she acts and responds and speaks in His power and authority and I am blessed because of it.

She’s the one I get to send all of my silly baby videos to because I know she see’s the beauty I see. She’s the one I get to bounce ideas off of and get real, honest, loving feedback from. She’s the one that knows my struggles because it takes one to know one; we are cut from some of the same cloth, she and I. What an honor…

She has loved me like her own for 6+ years now…given of herself so selflessly…and healed some wounded areas in my heart by doing so.

Mom-a-la, you are a treasure. Thank the Lord for Wal-Mart and bright blue church t-shirts. My life wouldn’t be the same without you in it. Thank you for all you do for me and for being the best spiritual momma (and real momma) a girl could ever ask for.

And finally, my sweet friend, Roisin. She is breathtakingly beautiful, incredibly organized and efficient, unshakable in any way shape or form and is the most loving, doting, Godly mother I have ever met. She is the wife and mom I aspire to be.

She and the kids came and stayed with us for a couple of days (poor Mike had to work – we missed you!) and we had the best time! Hence my sappy heart today…

She and Mike are the epitome of Godly parents. They love the Lord and are constantly and consistently taking the pieces of their lives back to Him and His word and strive to live in obedience to Him…and the fruit of their labors is evident.

Her kids are so gentle and loving and encouraging, not only to each other, but to our kids as well. For the past two days, they have helped Wryder up and down the stairs…helped me change baby Sayble’s diapers…played all kinds of silliness with both kids…blessed Sawyer for her birthday…were so grateful and polite and easily entertained – these are the kinds of kids that are quite easy to love, by the way. 🙂

They are all of those things because she is all of those things. Her oldest daughter told me I needed a cape because I was super mom. If I need a cape, Roisin needs a cape AND a crown AND a ceptor…

She is a wife who honors her husband; she loves him and loves to spend time with him and takes joy in being his helpmate. She takes care of her home and always has it in such splendid order, despite the wildly creative fun the kids are always engaged in. She prays for her family and over her family and is very intentional about teaching them how to love and honor the Lord and each other. She is a devoted friend – quick to listen, quick to pray and quick to lend hand. She has loved me and my family from day one without any reservations or hesitations; she was just all in!

Someone once told me that she’s the woman who, if it weren’t for her overwhelmingly kind and gracious self, you’d just want to punch in the face for being so darn near perfect. It made me laugh because I agreed. 🙂

Sweet Roisin, you are such an inspiration to me. If I could do life half as graciously as you, I would consider myself wildly successful. Thank you for loving my family so wholly. We feel quite undeserving of your affection and your time but we are oh-so grateful for it. You and your family mean more to us than we could ever, ever fully put into words. Just know you are in our hearts. And? I’d never punch you in the face, just so we’re clear.

So thankful for these wonderful women. Thankful to tears. Sappy momma needs a nap…

Four Little Words

My husband has the privilege to work for a really neat company. (Neat doesn’t really do them justice, but if you could hear the warmth in my voice when I say that, you’d better understand.) They do a lot of things exceptionally well in my book, including the ways they use their time and resources.

They’ve always been big supporters of the local and regional homeless shelters and supply them with meat every week. Two weeks ago, under the organization of their fabrication floor manager, they took their efforts up a notch in order to connect with this community of people in a more personal way.

The employees at the plant teamed up with the regional homeless shelter and safe house and hosted a family fun day. They cooked out and fed everyone, as well as rented out the zoo and mini-golf park for a day of fun. How cool is that?!

The employees served in every capacity and got to just hang out and love on these people for an afternoon. It was one of those events where they came back (perhaps) more impacted than those they went to serve.

Packing plants can be dark places. It’s an industry with no “easy” jobs, a decent amount of turnover and the employee base can be made up of a rougher crowd of folks. This place is different; these people are doing their best to shine the light of Jesus inside the plant and out.

Wrex was telling me about a manager there named Roy. Roy holds Bible studies AT the plant and is really invested in the company, but especially his employees. In the past year, he’s led 10 people into a personal relationship with the Lord. He’s a mover and a shaker and he inspires people to be better and love harder and live more righteously and to change the world around them for His glory.

As Wrex was telling me about the event and about him, my heart was overcome with emotion. Through tears, I said, “I’ve always wanted to be one of THOSE people…” Haven’t you? What joy there is in doing the work of the Lord and making an impact on this generation and generations to come!

Before I could even finish my sentence proclaiming that I wasn’t, Sawyer immediately interjected with, “But you are, momma.”

As a doer myself, I often wonder if I’m doing enough. I have dreams and desires regarding the Kingdom of God and issues that pull at every ounce of my being. I see and hear of needs that I so desperately want to be a part of finding a solution for.

Sometimes it feels like needs are so much more pronounced and visible in bigger cities so it makes it easier to meet them there. That’s not always the case in small town America…though I know some of those same needs exist here, too.

And it’s not just responding to need. A Bible teacher once talked to us about responding to need vs. responding to the Holy Spirit. We could exhaust ourselves financially, emotionally, physically, etc. if we simply set out to meet every need we ever encountered; need knows no end! But when we respond to the promptings of the Holy Spirit (give where He says to give, go where He says to go, etc,) we can better impact the world in His name, for His glory.

Sawyer’s sweet little interjection caught me completely off guard and in that moment, the Lord used her to get my attention. He spoke directly to my heart and told me there was always more room for good done in His name in this ole world…but He showed me that the person I was saying I wanted to be…I AM to my husband and kids.

And isn’t that where it has to start? In your heart and then your own home?? If I don’t love my husband or children well, how on earth can I love a friend, much less a stranger? If I don’t have a marriage that emulates what the word says a marriage should look like, how on earth can anyone take any other ministry I have seriously? If I can’t teach my children about the Father heart of God and the righteousness He desires from them, how on earth can I be effective elsewhere?

It was a good reminder that right now, this IS my primary ministry. Yes, there are things we’re called to do regardless of our position in life…care for the orphan, widow and alien…share the Good News…be kind and loving and joyful and gracious and merciful, etc. It’s great to dream big, Kingdom sized dreams…but don’t grow weary of doing good in your own home. You are impacting more people than you realize – for better or for worse – I guarantee it. Make sure it’s for the better.

It was so nice to be “seen” tonight by someone I love and trust and adore.

It was nice to have the lies of the enemy squelched just as they passed my ears, before they fully wreaked havoc on my head and my heart.

It was nice to be able to receive such awesome revelation in a moment when I needed it most.

It was nice to be ministered to from my own ministry.

“But you are, momma…”

Four simple words that have inspired me to keep fighting the good fight. She saw those things in me, because she’s been on the receiving end of what I’ve given away. She’s been inspired. She’s been encouraged to do better. She’s been the recipient of an unconditional love.

I’m thankful for the hubby’s job and company and even more grateful to have my job and ministry be one and the same. The ministry that is Wrex and Sawyer and Wryder and Sayble will, indeed, transform generations to come. Lord, help me to do this and do it well.

A Decade of Love

Several years ago, I did a study on covenant. To say it changed my life and the way I understood the Lord and His word is a COMPLETE understatement. It. was. AMAZING and completely fascinating. (It’s honestly, one of my favorite things to talk about EVER so if you have questions, let’s chat!)

Back in Biblical times, people would “cut a covenant” as a way of making a binding, holy, irrevocable contract. To cut a covenant, they would perform a covenant ceremony which you can read about (in the most succinct version I could find) here.

The closest thing we have in our day is marriage and the wedding ceremony. When we choose to marry our mate, we are choosing to create a blood covenant with them…an irrevocable, holy and binding agreement. We now share such a close relationship with each other that all we have or possess in this life is available to each upon demand.

Everything that is good that I have, you now have. You will benefit from my organization and my efficiency…my cooking and cleaning abilities…my heart for the widow and the orphan…my bold loyalty to those that I love and my fierce protectiveness of my family.

Everything that is good that you have, I now have. I will benefit from your patience and grace…your spirit of servant leadership…your easy exhortations and your adventurous nature.

Everything that is not so good – every weakness and every hardship – that I have, you now have. You and I will have to work through my spirit of abandonment and my ability to withdraw for fear of being hurt…my constant state of worry…my temper that can flare and my inability to understand (or work) anything that requires an engineer’s mind – yes, even the stinkin’ waterhose.

Everything that is not so good – every weakness and every hardship that you have, I now have. You and I will have to work through your inability to keep track of time and the way you can never effectively end a casual conversation so we (or whoever you’re talking to) can move on to something different….your wanton workaholic tendencies…your inability to put things away or keep the garage clean.

Every tool or ability I possess, you now possess. You are now an administrative whiz! You can juggle a plethora of tasks simultaneously and write, give and critique the spoken word with pleasure and authority. You can poof hair and change diapers and decorate on a dime.

Every tool or ability you possess, I now possess. I can now fix anything and everything…no really, anything and everything. I am proficient in plumbing, electricity, carpentry, welding. I can break horses and fit a steer and use the grill. I have incredible marksmanship and am as strong as an ox!

When we walk down the street, people should wonder if they’re seeing you or me. There should be no division in our beliefs or thoughts or ideas or desires or possessions or the way we view the world. We should be a solid unit of ONE because of the Lord’s ability to supernaturally commingle our lives. I’m identified as you and you are identified as me.

I am now a Phipps. I carry your name as a sign that I am in a covenant relationship with you. I no longer operate under my own authority, but yours. I take into account your opinion and your desires and I make every decision as this new unit of one. I am now you, and you are now me. I take on your personality and character and reputation and essence and authority. I care for you just as I care for myself because of our unity.

Ten years ago today we stood in this very spot, under that old pecan tree, and declared our undying love and commitment to each other. You have less hair, I have more body mass and together, we have three outlandishly beautiful children to show for it.

As much as I’d like to say that I did, I didn’t truly understand the weight and the beautiful severity of the vows I took on that day 10 years ago. I’m still learning what it truly means to be a wife and covenant partner. I’m still learning to die to myself and to live for the Lord and for our marriage and for our children – who, by the way, are the most perfect product of our love I could ever imagine.

But I’m getting it…and I’m vowing to make the next 10 years even better than the first…is that even possible?!

I am so thankful that you chose me. Our dating days weren’t perfect and our story could’ve ended in several different ways on several different days…praise HIM that this was the “ending” He had in mind and that we were obedient to that.

In all my days or wildest dreams, I couldn’t have dreamt up a better husband or partner or lover or teammate. You are the best man I know. I still can’t believe I get to wake up next to you every morning…

Loving you has been the easiest, most rewarding thing I’ve ever done. Thanks for making my life, Wrex Phipps. Being your wife and the mother of your kids is an honor and a privilege; my soul is satisfied.

I Got the Gift

Well, well…fancy meeting you here again. 😉 I’ve been a little m-i-a since the wee one was born. Do ya blame me?! I mean, look at that sweet face…

I rejoin the blogging world for a very special occasion…this handsome fella’s 33rd birthday!

I always feel like I’m the one getting the gift on his birthday.

As a little girl and young woman, when I was dreaming up my ideal husband, I couldn’t have put together someone more perfect than my Wrexy. He’s all things good and kind and gentle and sweet and loving and right and joyful…and watching him (especially) the past 3 weeks has made me fall in love with him all over again.

He was a champ – a dream – in the delivery room. Having a natural labor requires a LOT of teamwork and he was the best teammate I could’ve asked for (much like the other parts of my life). He encouraged me and let me squeeze his hand until I thought it might fall off…he held me up when I couldn’t hardly hold myself up and kept me on track when I wanted to cave to pain killers…he supplied me with cold rags and words of affirmation…he counted and encouraged and encouraged some more and encouraged even more…he was a constant ray of sunshine and excitement… I mean this to the fullest extent – there is NO WAY I could’ve birthed that baby without him.

When Dr. Kohl came in the next day, she checked me over and then she said something to the effect of, “I just have to tell you something. Yesterday, during labor, I was so impressed with you and Wrex. My favorite part was that during transition, he was calling you ‘Fox’.”

Ah, yes…transition. That point in labor where the pain is almost unbearable and you start thinking you can’t do it (and don’t want to) and you say that this is your last baby and you are writhing in pain… And in the middle of all of that…when I (most likely) wasn’t looking my best or acting my best or even coherent enough be fully aware of all that was going on around me, he was treating me like I was the foxiest thing he’d seen all day. See what I mean when I say I feel like I’m the one getting the gift?!

Watching him with this sweet, new babe is equally swoon worthy. He’s so gentle with her and talks about how cute she is and dotes on her constantly. He’ll hold her and she’ll fall asleep and he’ll say, “You should come take our picture.” Uh, ask me for anything and you can have it this very moment.

He’s my best friend and lover and teammate extraordinaire and I am SO VERY GLAD that he was born!

Sexy Wrexy, I pray that 33 is your best year yet! On this, the best day in June, I bless you in the name of Jesus!

I bless the work of your hands…that the Lord would honor your fortitude and entrepreneurial spirit and that you would continue to operate for His glory.

I bless you with loyalty…that the same amount of faith and fidelity that your pour out to those around you would be given right back to you.

I bless you with with the receipt of grace and mercy…that it would envelop you as freely as you give it away.

I bless you with strength and boldness as you continue to live a life of transparency that shines the light of Jesus, even in (and especially in) those dark places.

I bless you with an increase in wisdom…that you would press into the Lord and receive His heart on how best to parent and love and discipline our growing family.

I bless you with the time and means to pursue the things that satisfy your soul and refresh your spirit.

And, as any good cow buyer’s wife would, I bless you with cheap cows and easy roads…copious amounts of Mt. Dew and highly marbled steak.

I love you, handsome! Happiest of birthdays to you! Thank you for giving me the gift of YOU all year long…

Just Waiting – With Some REALLY Excellent People

Today is Sayble’s due date! I suppose I have a few more hours of wishful thinking that she may join us outside of the womb, but I’m thinking today is probably not the day.

Three of us Phipps cousins were all due within two weeks of each other, me being due first (ahem) and they have all had their babies as of today. I can now say I’m FOR SURE next! 🙂

I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve such amazing, loving, encouraging, Godly women in my life, but they have just showered me in prayers and messages of encouragement the past few days.

When I thought I was sliding down the slippery slope of “I can’t do this! I don’t want her to come out,” my sweet sister says, “You will be fine! You’re a pro at this!” My sister in the faith said, “I pray that your body begins to relax knowing that you were MADE to have this baby, CREATED to have her. Your body and heart will sync up beautifully!” I’m trying to live THERE.

A sweet friend was praying over my labor and upcoming induction and unprompted she said, “I was thinking earlier today that God has always been faithful especially regarding the birth of your babies and He will do it again! I just feel so confident in His plan for Sayble, too!” Wow. Who does that?!

My two (beautiful and uber-classy) aunts, the moms of both cousins who have now met there sweet little babes, have checked on me oh-so dutifully and both reached out to me today to encourage me and cheer me on! I can assure I’ve done nothing to receive such favor!

I’ve had friends send me scriptures and blog posts. Even my nail lady got in on the action and had researched labor-inducing pressure points for my feet when I went in yesterday to get my pedicure. Our mail lady stopped by today to see me one last time before baby was born and set up a time to bring us a meal and meet miss Sayble.

I tell ya, the Lord has blessed us with some of the most loving and generous people… I have just been in awe of His love for us because of the love of His people.

And so, we wait some more. I’m doing my last big house cleaning today and tomorrow we’re gonna run a few errands and have some fun with the kids. Sunday has already been reserved as a day of NOTHING…and I’m really looking forward to it. Unless…

Unless…she decides to grace us with her presence before induction. I’d be ok with that, too. 🙂

Pray for me if you think about it…for a safe, healthy, complication-free, easy, fast, natural birth! That’s not too much to ask for, is it?! I kinda giggled as I wrote that but I distinctly heard the Lord say, “Not for me…”

Let it be so.

Wryder Roo is Two!

Happy birthday, Wryder Roo! You’re two! TWO! Even though when we ask you these days, you tell us you’re six…ahem.

You are all boy – from the tip of your head to the bottoms of your feet. They stink. Really, they do. You have the stinkiest, sweatiest feet of anyone I know and I think it’s adorable. I must be your mother, huh? It just reminds me of just how all boy you really are.

Anything that makes noise or has wheels or involves mud or rocks or sticks or jumping off of something – you are all about it! You are very dexterous like your daddy and almost always have something in your hand. You love to put rocks in your “pot-tet” or carry around a stick or throw dirt…we’re still working on that one, aren’t we?

You love ANYTHING tractor (especially the green ones). Thankfully, the guys across the road are going to be planting alfalfa soon and have had to do a lot ground work in preparation for that. You’ve stood on the porch and watched them for hours already…you just wait til they start swathing and baling – I might never get you inside!

Watching intently as the neighbors work ground

You LOVE to eat. Even just the mention of the word snack or supper gets you to drop what you’re holding and run to your seat in the kitchen. We haven’t found too many things you won’t eat…in fact, I’m not sure I can think of a single one. You are definitely your “father’s son” (as Sawyer says) and you love meat and potatoes…and any sweet that gets put in front of you.

A birthday treat from our waitress yesterday... — A birthday treat from our waitress yesterday…

You seem to love the ladies, ahem, which we’re ok with. Daddy does a great job (and will continue to, no doubt) show you how to treat a woman according to Christ. Your extroversion serves you well in this department…as does your general charm and the ease at which you throw around your “I wuv yous.” Just do us a favor and be kind to ALL the girls, not just the young, tall, dark haired ones, ok??

Despite all that masculinity you have coursing through your veins, you are so good at showing love…

You love your family fiercely, which I adore. Your sissy is your best friend and daddy ranks a close second. I suppose I’m not really ever gone enough to test your allegiance, but I’m ok with that. 😉

Every time I hear your little voice say, “Momma hug. Momma kiss,” I just melt. I shall give you all the hugs and kisses you shall ever want…and probably quite a few you’d not.

Oh, I love him so... — Oh, I love him so…

Your laugh and zeal are SO contagious! You are easily excited by the things in your world that are so important to you…tractors and baby calves and monkeys and Booey and sissy and Bandit the cat and going to town and cowboy hats and birthdays and semi trucks and cookies…and it makes us excited, too!

You’re an emotional little guy. Change, especially abrupt change, is hard for you. We have to take our time to tell things “bye” or prepare for whatever comes next. I suppose you get that from your ~~type A, anal retentive~~ mother. Ahem.

You’re very persistent when it comes to…just about everything. We’ve discovered that the “just ignore him and he will stop asking/repeating/whining” thing doesn’t really work with you. It works best to nip it in the bud and attempt to move on. I have no doubts that this will serve you well in some (or many) arenas in your adult life one day.

Your whole existence has been a big change for me! You and Sawyer aren’t just a ton alike and that’s taken some getting used to. (See above paragraph regarding change. Ahem.) I feel like I’m finally getting in my boy groove…and it. is. good. You have added an element to our family that I didn’t even know was missing and man-oh-man, it has been so rewarding and fun…for all of us. We are better because of you, it’s true!

Ride a little pony... — Ride a little pony…

On your second birthday, we bless you in the name of Jesus! We bless your hands – that they would do the work of the Lord. We bless your feet – that they would carry you far from mischief. We speak to your future and call it blessed and we pray that the deep persistence that abides in you will be used to stand firm for the Lord as you further His kingdom. We pray that as you hunger and thirst in life, that your greatest ones will be for more of Him and His word and His presence. We bless you with a life that nurtures your boyish heart; one of adventure and excitement as you follow the Lord!

We love you so much, handsome! The Lord redeemed “tax day” when you were born!