See Ya Later, Alligator

Today is the last day of 2013 and I’m not all that excited to see it go. It’s been a year of more mountain tops than valleys, so it’s not like I’m just dying to rush it out and ring something else in.

Time just keeps ticking and ticking and ticking on by – where did 2013 go?! Days with my Wrexy seem shorter and my kids keep growing up without permission! While it is such a joy to see the little adults they are becoming, I don’t want to miss a single day with any of them. I want to take it slow and press it all into the wrinkles in my brain so I don’t forget these days. My life with my little family is significantly more blessed than I ever could’ve imagine for myself. Who am I that He would bestow such merciful blessings on me?

Highlights of 2013

We were blessed with a sweet baby boy (on tax day – he’s redeeming it!)…

Isn't the the cutest?! He was about 5 hours old here... — Isn’t he the cutest?! He was about 5 hours old here…

Sawyer turned 3 and got to celebrate with a host of family and friends…

She requested a cat party so cat party we had!

We got to go on a vacation to Denver and make lots of memories as a family…

At the Children's Museum - one of many fun stops! — At the Children’s Museum – one of many fun stops!

Sawyer got to show her first goat…

We celebrated our 8th wedding anniversary by bowling as a family…

Wryder slept and the rest of us had fun!

We traveled to Kansas to witness one of our best friends’ wedding…

I got to act out my obedience to the Lord and start this blog…

It's been SUCH a blessing! — It’s been SUCH a blessing!

Sawyer got to be in our neighbor’s wedding…

We got to spend time with the majority of the Phipps family at a cousin’s wedding…

Add all of that to everyday blessings plus visits from family and friends…

2013 was good!

Where did it go? It went by in family dinners, road trips and snuggle sessions…in Cubbies meetings, sale barns and swimming pools…in weddings and pony rides and birthday parties and midnight feedings and suppers in the kitchen and jumps on the trampoline…those everyday moments that make up minutes and hours and days and weeks and months and years and LIFE. I sit here sentimental, cherishing each one…

but I shall embrace 2014 just the same.

You are good and do only good; teach me your decrees.

The Lord has been so good to us…and we pray…

…let 2014 be more about You and less about us.

…let 2014 be more full of grace and love and mercy and kindness and self-discipline and joy and less of their oppositions.

…let 2014 be more about Your will and less about ours.

…let 2014 be about YOU. And only YOU.

Happy new year to you and yours!

I am the Nativity

My “adopted mom” wrote this a couple of Christmases ago and it might just be my favorite thing she’s written…and I have a lot of favorites when it comes to her.

These words came pouring from her heart as a prayer one morning and it is goose-bump inducing beauty. PLEASE (yes, I’m begging!) take a minute to slow down and soak in the pieces of the Christmas scene. It will be well worth your time. ***click on the green link below***

http://www.jeanierhoades.com/i-am-the-nativity/

Jesse Tree

Sawyer is such an amazing little girl, if I do say so myself. She has such an inquisitive nature and has always been really interested in learning. On top of that, her memory is absolutely incredible. She’s been memorizing scripture ever since she was about 18 months old and she has well over 50 verses committed to memory right now. We are careful to foster these things in her and to fill her mind with things worth remembering – thus the Jesse Tree.

Our "tree" part isn't so pretty. I'll work on that for next year - ha! This was the we gotta get this ready to go by December version... — Our “tree” part isn’t so pretty. I’ll work on that for next year – ha! This was the we gotta get this ready to go by December version…

The Jesse Tree is our version of Christmas advent calendar. I love this season as much as anyone and while I’m completely game for baking cookies and making ornaments and having fun experiences, I also want her to really get WHO we’re celebrating and WHY. So, while we definitely do those things, we attempt make our main focus JESUS.

Each night, we take an ornament piece, a person in the lineage of Christ, and learn about them and how they are tied to, and point to, Jesus.

Jesus was promised by God to His people long before He was born. In Isaiah, we read that Jesus would be a “shoot,” like a new sprout that grows on a bush or tree, from the family tree of Jesse. Jesse was the father of David, a great king of Israel, and Jesus was born 1,000 years after Him. The tree starts at creation and points to the coming of the Messiah with each story.

There's a rich history on this board... — There’s a rich history on this board…

I feel like she learned quite a bit last year, but this year she has just amazed me with how much she’s taking away from every scripture. And? It’s good for her mom and dad, too. In a world that has watered down the true meaning of the mass of Christ, it’s so good to reset our focus on HIM.

You can find quite a few different versions online if you want to do this at your own house – which I highly encourage. We got this pattern from a woman at our old church back in Denver and it has served us well so far.

I pray you keep your minds and eyes and ears and hearts attuned to One whom we celebrate this season..the shoot of Jesse, that bears new fruit…

Out of the stump of David’s family will grow a shoot—
    yes, a new Branch bearing fruit from the old root.
And the Spirit of the Lord will rest on him—
    the Spirit of wisdom and understanding,
the Spirit of counsel and might,
    the Spirit of knowledge and the fear of the Lord.
He will delight in obeying the Lord.
    He will not judge by appearance
    nor make a decision based on hearsay.
He will give justice to the poor
    and make fair decisions for the exploited.
The earth will shake at the force of his word,
    and one breath from his mouth will destroy the wicked.
He will wear righteousness like a belt
    and truth like an undergarment.

In that day the heir to David’s throne
    will be a banner of salvation to all the world.
The nations will rally to him,
    and the land where he lives will be a glorious place.

Never in a Million Years

Yesterday, you got to revel in the complete preciousness of Sawyer and Wryder. Today? The whole family! Stormie took soooo many – it was hard to choose just a few to showcase here but these are my faves – enjoy!

Honestly, that last one might be fave because it’s just sooooooo Wrex! I chickened out using it for our Christmas card because I didn’t want to offend anyone. 😉 If Wryder was looking at that camera, you might’ve had to shield your eyes opening your envelope.

I am so thankful for these photos. They are the first official family photos we’ve had done with kiddos and I love that Stormie captured this season of our life. Even more so, I’m thankful for my little family. Never in a million years did I dream I’d be this blessed. Never in a million years did I expect to have a husband as wonderful and kind and patient and forgiving and gracious and loving as Wrex. Never in a million years did I think I’d have kids as sweet and kind and smart and cute and compassionate as these two little loves. Never in a million years did I think I’d be this divinely happy to share my life and my time and my resources and my energy with such wonderful beings. Never in a million years would I have really believed that this kind of love existed. But I assure you – it does.

I have delighted in Him and He has given me the desires of my heart. I am forever grateful…forever singing His praises…forever turning my gift back to Him…forever…for a million years plus forever…

Pa Rum Pum Pum Pum

This video is making it’s way across the web and may I just say – AH-MAY-ZING. Those cats are talented! Gifted! Anointed! It’s incredible. Goosegump inducing awesomeness. Watch it, would ya?

The lyrics of this old favorite caught me and flat jostled me upon hearing them; moved me in a way they never have before.

This little drummer boy is heading out to see the King; the King of Kings, in fact. He sees those around him gathering up the finest gifts they can find for this new born babe. But he? He has no gift. He has nothing to give that is worthy of this royalty.

I am a poor boy, too – pa rum pum pum pum

I have no gift to bring – pa rum pum pum pum

That’s fit to give the King – pa rum pum pum pum

I kind of chuckled because I feel his pain. I get that – we are in the same boat, my drumming friend. There is so much I want to do and so much I want to give and so much I want to give towards, but it’s hard right now. In this season of ThanksGIVING, I want to open my hands wide and pour out blessing after blessing after blessing to honor Him but I find myself short. What can I give? What can I bestow that would honor the King in a way He deserves? Even if I was a millionaire, what could I lavish Him with that would be worthy enough? What could I heap upon Him that would beat in line with His heart?

Shall I play for you – pa rum pum pum pum –

on my drum?

I played my drum for Him – pa rum pum pum pum

I played my best for Him – pa rum pum pum pum

In those moments, the Lord spoke to me and showed me how I can give gifts to Him using what I do have; gifts that are worthy of a King, gifts that would still truly honor Him.

Speak kindly to your husband and your kids. (This season of life can get crazy. Boundary testing and sleep training and diaper changing and shoe tieing all on top of the holidays – don’t let it rule you. These people are your biggest blessing; let your words make them know that.)

Be patient with them. (No one is going to do things exactly as you would do them. Your husband trusts this home to you and is willing to help when needed, so show him some grace. Your kids are only little once. They’re still learning how to do things and how not to do things. Show them some grace.)

Enjoy them. (My second best gift to you is under your roof. Take delight in them. Their differences, their similarities, their quirks and their ticks. Press into those hugs and be quick to make memories.)

Spend quality time with them. (Time is ticking by, isn’t it? Let the dishes rot in the sink. Let the floors be covered in crumbs. Let the laundry go and resort to mismatched clothes. Play more dress up. Play more farm. Play more games. Read more books. Leave a legacy of the fear of the Lord, not a legacy of cleanliness.)

Spend quality time with Me. (Oh! I have much to show and teach you. About you. About Me. I long to be with you even more than you long to be with your family. Hard to fathom, yes? But it’s true. Keep carving out chunks for me and I promise to keep meeting you like I did today, too.)

Tell them what I’ve done for you. (I’ve saved you from so much and am saving you still! I don’t want mediocrity for you. I don’t want survival for you. I want life and life abundantly for you!)

These are gifts that will definitely delight Me.

Then He smiled at me – pa rum pum pum pum

Me and my drum – pa rum pum pum pum

Six simple gifts that will genuinely bless His heart and bring honor to His name. Isn’t that my goal after all? I have much to be thankful for, much to sing His praises about…and much to give in return. Happy Thanksgiving, friends! May your heart beat in line with the King of Kings and may you lift up thanks to Him today.

Pa rum pum pum pum…

Thoughts on Thanksgiving

What are you thankful for?

The question that will be asked around countless dinner tables a week from tomorrow. The question that shouldn’t take much thought to answer…

The Lord’s grace…my family…my friends…my home…my amenities…my freedoms…

I’ve written about some of the things I’m thankful for here and here. And here and here and here. Gratitude is a beautiful thing! I know it delights the heart of the Lord to hear His children thanking Him for the good gifts He has given; gifts we don’t deserve but gifts He gives regardless.

Ann Voskamp posed this thought:

What if the question around holiday tables wasn’t: What are you so grateful for?

__

But rather: How are you changing the world because you are so grateful?

Good question, yes?

Shouldn’t we be acting out our faith and moving mountains for other people because we can’t contain our gratitude? Shouldn’t we be tripping over ourselves looking for moments to bless and aid and assist because we’ve been so blessed and aided and assisted? Shouldn’t we be giving so sacrificially of our time, resources and talents that we’ve nowhere to turn and no one to point to except the Lord?

Yes, let’s give upwardly! Let’s give the Lord due praise – EVERY.SINGLE.THING we have comes from Him! He is most worthy of our gratitude…but less us also give outwardly, in His name…

I have a friend who posted on Facebook about her morning experience. She was in the waiting room of her doctor’s office waiting to be seen when an elderly lady came in; one who was obviously sick and needed medical care. The elderly lady didn’t have money to pay her copay so they had her reschedule her appointment to a day when she would have the funds. My lovely friend, jumped up and paid the co-pay.

That is Christ in action. That is a life changing the world because of gratitude. That is a life living out the ‘giving’ piece of ThanksGIVING…because how can we have Thanksgiving without the giving??

I pray that as you’re enjoying your family time and your turkey dinner…as you’re counting your blessings and recounting the goodness of the Lord…that the borders of your heart are expanding and that the world around you starts changing because of your gratitude. And not changing just for this season…for good. We are blessed to be a blessing so let’s live it…

Everything We Need

We got our propane tank filled a week or so ago…and the rest of my hospital bill (from when I had Wryder) came in the mail Monday…and we’ve made a few trips to the doctor and the pharmacy lately, so today was budget day. Always a good time, yes? No.

I got out the computer and the bills, and opened our online bank account and my budget spreadsheet and went to work. I am so thankful for Wrex’s job. I’m not sure my words could ever adequately describe how it compares to our previous situation. Night and day, people! (In a GREAT way!) He loves it and he’s darn good at it and he has a lot more time at home than his former job. Is it the highest paying job on the planet? Nope, but we have an income – that’s more than a lot of people out there. Plus, he’s always finding little ways to make a few more dollars for our family. Every chance he gets, he’s out doing something extra to support us. He is a great provider and would work four jobs before we were ever left in want, this I know to be true.

So, I sat there with the bills and the calculator and my spreadsheet and was doing some inserting and deleting and adding…and a lot of subtracting…ahem. I was trying to figure out if we could pay those big two (propane and hospital) without transferring money from savings (because that money is off limits in my mind) but because it’s a big, yearly purchase like that, (propane) I just couldn’t make it work. And I hate taking money from savings. Ugh. And I feel like we’ve had to do that a lot this year…for all sorts of random things…as we don’t have a ton leftover at the end of every week/month.

We’ve revisited the budget a lot since Wryder was born and it can be depressing. We’re to the point where there just isn’t money for eating out on Sunday’s after church or for grabbing a pop when we go to town or for going to Denver every other month to see friends…it’s just not there. Tithe and formula and diapers and groceries and check-ups pull rank, ya know? And Wrex and I both have generous hearts (if I do say so myself). We love to give and bless and surprise and come alongside and help…and we haven’t been able to do that kind of stuff (outside of tithing) as of late…and we miss it and long for it.

So, I’m sitting there with my head swimming with questions about what to do and how to make it all work and what we need to cut back on so that we can not steal from savings and so we can give more? I’m kicking myself for spending money going out to eat and on a pop now and then. My heart is screaming about the injustices of it all; that American mentality of entitlement that tells me I deserve certain things in life. Why CAN’T we eat out on Sundays?? Why CAN’T we grab a pop now and then?!? Why CAN’T I buy a few things at a thrift store?!?! And the tears started to come, because it’s a weird place to be in and it feels unfair!

And then…

My sweet little, stuffy nosed girl comes in the kitchen and hands me a paper leaf for the thankful tree. She said, “Mom, can you write on this for me? This one is for Wryder. He said he’s thankful that we have everything we need.”

BAM. Brought back to reality by a wise beyond her years 3 year old. “We do indeed, sweet girl. We do indeed.”

As I wrote those words and stuck the leaf to the tree, my heart softened and my attitude of gratitude swelled. Lord, I have so much to be thankful for. Thank you for reminding me of that, again. You have always provided for us. Even in our darkest hours and driest of bank accounts, you have always provided.

I’m thankful we even have a little kitty to dip out of…I’m thankful my husband has a job PERIOD and with a great company, no less…I’m thankful our insurance hasn’t changed, even with this Obamacare crap…I’m thankful that my family is healthy and whole…I’m thankful we have a roof over our heads and some room to roam…I’m thankful I even have a family and that I’m not still waiting on Mr. Right or waiting for the Lord to open my womb to have children.

We have everything we need. Help me not to be a slave to a bank account, Lord. You are everything we need.

Thankful Tree

Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise. Give thanks to him, bless his name. Psalm 100:4

The first of the month kicked off our family’s thankful tree activity. Nothing fancy – just pure, unadulterated gratefulness for the countless blessings we have in our lives.

We ARE a blessed people! We have a roof over our head that is comfortable and climate controlled…we have access to a clean, safe water supply (that can be heated for comfort and cleanliness)…we have the cheapest, safest and most wholesome food supply in the world…we have the privilege to worship how we so choose…we live in a democratic society that although, not perfect, is better than every other alternative… we are healthy and thriving…my husband has a job and one that provides for our financial needs…I have the benefit of staying home to raise our children…we have more than enough food in our cupboards and freezers and stomachs…we have totes of clothes we aren’t currently wearing…we have extra shoes in our mudroom…we own animals for pleasure…we have access to more than one vehicle…we have MORE.THAN.ENOUGH.

Let us not forget from whom all blessings flow.

Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. James 1:17

So, we will praise Him. We will praise Him with our voices and words and blogs. We will praise Him with our attitudes and the posture of our hearts. We will praise Him with our paper leaves.

It’s funny how something so simple can evoke such emotion. To hear Sawyer say she’s grateful for her…

just takes my breath away. She gets it.

Daddy said he was thankful that…

to which Sawyer quickly replied, “No, silly! We live in Holyoke!”

And the past couple of days? I’ve been especially thankful…

The ways in which He provides for us are many and we’re really good at celebrating the gift…but let us not refrain from worshiping THE GIVER.

My heart overflows in gratitude for all He has given…and for the things He took that He knew I didn’t need. Really thankful for those things, too…

Let us cultivate a spirit of gratitude among us, in all things and in all times. It leads to joy. It leads to selflessness. It leads to a greater perspective. It leads to Him.

Help My Unbelief

I’m currently doing a Precepts Bible study on Joseph with my church and it is SO good. Man alive. So good. I love these studies because they use the Word to prove the validity of the Word. How can ya beat that?!

The end of last night’s homework had us examine who God is and it’s one of the most well-written lists of His attributes I’ve ever seen. The writer said,

You need to know, in order to trust Him.

So true, yes? I want Sawyer and Wryder to get an accurate view of the Lord. I want them to see Him for all of these good things that He is and oh, how I want them to trust Him! As their mom, I have to 1.) believe those things of Him myself and 2.) act like Him. For a while now, I’ve realized that my view of Him isn’t entirely accurate. I’ve listened to the lies of satan and have succumbed to the (not) fact that He’s a mean, punishing, vengeful, better-be-on-your-best-behavior-or-I-will-kill-you-off, game-playing kind of God. (Just reading that sounds APPALLING. How in the world is that love and how in the world would I ever love Him in return??!?!) Working on that. Because if you search His Word that isn’t Him at all.

When we speak of God’s attributes, we are speaking of His essential being or character. His character is a composition of all His attributes. In other words, when we talk about one of God’s attributes, we are not talking about a part of His being, but rather His whole character. For example, God is love…but not just a part of Him is love. Love is the essence of His being; however, He is also wrathful. One attribute does not contradict the other, rather they make God who He is. Therefore, whenever God acts in any given situation, all His attributes are used simultaneously in perfect harmony. He never suspends one so He can use another.

Great explanation, yes?! Now I just need to drill it into my head and drop it into my heart.

He is omniscient. God knows all. He has perfect knowledge of everything that is past, present or future. (Job 37:16, Psalm 139:1-6)
He is omnipotent. God possesses all power. He is able to bring about anything that He has decided to do with or without the use of any source beyond Himself. (Job 42:2, Psalm 33:6-9)
He is omnipresent. God is present everywhere, in all the universe, at all times, in the totality of His character. (Proverbs 15:3, Jeremiah 23:23-24)
He is eternal. God has no beginning, and He has no end. He is not confined to the finiteness of time or to man’s reckoning of time. He is, in fact, the cause of time. (Deuteronomy 32:40, Revelation 1:8, Isaiah 57:15)
He’s immutable. God is always the same in His nature, His character and His will. He never changes, and He can never be made to change. (Malachi 3:6, Hebrews 13:8)
He is incomprehensible. Because God is God, He is beyond the understanding of man. His ways, character and acts are higher than man’s. Man only understands as God chooses to reveal Himself, His ways or His purposes. (Job 11:7, Romans 11:33)
He is self-existent. God depends upon nothing for His existence beyond Himself. The whole basis of His existence is withing Himself. At one time, nothing but God Himself existed. He added nothing to Himself by creation. (John 1:1-3, Exodus 3:14, John 5:26)
He is self-sufficient. Within Himself, God is able to act, that is, to bring about His will without any assistance. Although He may choose to use assistance, it is His good pleasure, not His need, that governs that choice. (Romans 11:36, Psalm 50:7-12)
He is infinite. God has no limits or bounds whatsoever in His person or dominion. (1 Kings 8:27, Psalm 145:3)
He is transcendent. God is above His creation, and He would exist if there were no creation. His existence is totally apart from His creatures or creation. (Isaiah 43:10, 55:8-9)
He is sovereign. God is totally, supremely, preeminently over all His creation. There is not a person or thing that has escaped His control and foreknown plan. (Psalm 103:19, Daniel 4:34-35, Isaiah 40:23)
He is gracious. God is a God of grace and always operates on the basis of His graciousness. (Exodus 34:6-7, Luke 2:40, 2 Corinthians 12:9)
He is righteous. God is always good. It is essential to His character. He always does the right thing. Ultimately, since He is God, whatever He does is right…He is the absolute. His actions are always consistent with His character…which is love. (Deuteronomy 32:4, Psalm 110:142)
He is merciful. God is an actively compassionate being. He responds compassionately toward those who have opposed His will in their pursuit of their own way. (Psalm 62:12, 86:15, 106:44-45)
He is long-suffering. God’s righteous anger is slow to be kindled against those who fail to listen to His warnings or to obey His instructions. His eternal longing for the highest good for His creatures holds back His holy justice. (Numbers 14:18, 2 Peter 3:9)
He is wise. God’s actions are based on His character. His wisdom causes Him to choose righteous ends and to make the most fitting plans to achieve those ends. (Isaiah 40:28, Daniel 2:20)
He is loving. God’s love moves Him to give Himself for another, even to the laying down of His own life. His love causes Him to desire His creatures’ highest good. This love is not based upon the worth, response, or merit of the object being loved. (Romans 5:8, 1 John 4:8, Ephesians 3:17-19)
He is good. In His goodness God gives to others, not according to what they deserve but according to His good will and kindness toward them. (2 Chronicles 5:13, Psalm 106:1)
He is wrathful. There is within God a hatred for all that is unrighteous and an unquenchable desire to punish all unrighteousness. Whatever is inconsistent with His holy standard must ultimately be atoned for or consumed. (Romans 1:18, John 3:36, Revelation 15:7)
He is truthful. All that God says is reality. Whether believed by man or not, whether seen as reality or not, what God has spoken is reality. Whatever He speaks is truth. (Numbers 23:19, Titus 1:2, John 17:17)
He is faithful. God is always true to His promises. He can never draw back from His promises of blessing or of judgment. Since He cannot lie, He is totally steadfast to what He has spoken. (Deuteronomy 7:9, 2 Timothy 2:13)
He is jealous. God is unwilling to share what is rightfully and morally His with any other creature. (Exodus 34:14, Isaiah 42:8)
He is holy. God is a morally excellent, perfect being. He is totally other than man! His is purity of being in every aspect. (Leviticus 10:2, Job 34:10, Isaiah 47:4, Isaiah 57:15)
He is just. God is fair in all of His actions. Whether He deals with man, angels or demons, He acts in total equity by rewarding righteousness and punishing sin. Since He knows all, every decree is absolutely just. (Psalm 89:14, Numbers 14:18, Romans 9:14)

I want to get this and to believe this. Not just say it. Not just memorize it. Not just agree with it. Not just type it out on my blog. I want to believe it. I want to have confidence in the fact that this IS who my God is…and I want to live in a fashion to reflects that. I want my children to be witness to a mom that loves the Lord and who tries her best to mirror His attributes; a mom who is loving and trustworthy and merciful and gracious and long-suffering and truthful and wise; a mom who lives under the authority of the One who is perfect in all things and in all ways and who loves her despite her shortcomings and who desires GOOD for her; a mom that trusts Him explicitly…..because He’s worthy of our trust…and He’s worthy of their trust.

There it is, your immutable God who never changes. His character can never be altered – nor His response; God never acts contrary to Himself. What peace, what security, what confidence this should bring to your heart and mind. Therefore, anytime you meet a biblical doctrine that you cannot fully understand or explain, or anytime you come across a situation in life that is difficult to understand, run to the shelter of the character and sovereignty of your God and rest quietly in these solid, immutable, eternal truths. Rest and order your affairs accordingly.

We will believe, Lord…me and my children and my children’s children and to a thousand generations…we will believe and we will live like we believe.

**All quotes and list of attributes are from the Precept Upon Precept study on Joseph – Keeping Your Focus When Your Dreams are Shattered**

Connecting your Child to Christ (Part 3 of 3)

So, we’ve talked about practical ways to connect your child to Christ; we’ve talked about proper discipline – now it’s time to talk about the ails of punishment. Punishment is the opposite of discipline. It tries to make a child ‘pay’ for what they have done wrong; it’s an eye for an eye type of “discipline”; it’s retaliation or revenge for what they’ve done wrong.

Punishment, which is focused on the past instead of future obedience, produces very negative characteristics in your children: guilt, shame, bitterness, resentment, regret, self-pity, fear, and more – none of which are from the Lord.

Punishment doesn’t give them a means to right their wrongs and it makes no mention of redemption. It is simply retribution that leads to a lot of negative emotions.

When we yell or raise our voice or lose our temper…when we tower over them…when we don’t even explain to them what they’ve done wrong…when we reactively swat or hit or thump or spank immediately after the offense…when we push them because they pushed their sibling…when we come at them in a rush of emotion…when we continue to be short with them/mad at them the rest of the day….that’s not discipline. That’s a bullying, frustrated parent who’s upset that you ticked them off/cost them time/broke the rules/hindered them in some way and now “they’re gonna get it.” Heartbreaking when you lump it all together like that isn’t it?

Discipline is the way of the Lord.

Discipline is future-focused, always pointing toward future acts. How can we help you not to do this poor choice again? It has nothing to do with retribution or paybacks and everything to do with redemption.

The purpose of discipline is to train for correction and maturity. The purpose of punishment is to inflict a penalty for an offense.

The origin of discipline is a high motivation for the welfare of the child. The origin of punishment is the frustration of the parent.

The result of discipline is security. The result of punishment results in fear and shame.

So often, we get this wrong and we HAVE to get this right. We have to. For the sake of our children and their children, we have to. These are our babies. Our rewards. Our blessings.

Those who know, say that as parents, we often revert to what we know. If our parents disciplined out of anger, then in the heat of the moment when we feel like we’ve lost control or we’re in a hurry or we’re frustrated, we’re gonna discipline out of anger. I’ve seen this in my own life, unfortunately. Even though I strive to discipline well and discipline God’s way, there are times when gruffness and impatience and a hot temper come crashing through and I HATE that. That’s not the kind of legacy I want to leave with my children…

Maybe you’re sitting here thinking, whoa…sometimes or most of the time or on occasion, I’m a punisher, not a discipliner …but disciplining seems like so much work and it seems so overwhelming and I have so many bad habits to break and new ones to make. First, welcome to the club and yes, you’re right. But it’s never too late to begin to do things God’s way. He will bless your efforts, this I know.

Parenting is not for the feint of heart. It’s a hard job and there are a lot of things to do and know and remember and learn to do and they all take one of our most precious commodities – TIME. THANKFULLY we have an instruction manual and we have the Holy Spirit and we have other Godly women to walk this out with us. And goodness knows we’re not gonna get it right all the time. I need do-over days just like everybody else, but we gotta give it our best.

As parents, it is our job, our responsibility, to teach our children about Jesus and how to act like Jesus; the good He’s done for them and the good He has in store for them. And that? Is worth our time. That’s a legacy worth leaving.